I have so much to think and say about one of the biggest thing that has happened so far, that I just had to write a post on it. Purely just my thoughts (in a rambling fashion as usual).

I’m breaking this post into 2 sections – Kwon Soo Ah’s personality and the Reactions to her attempt at suicide.

Kwon Soo Ah – What really got me thinking about her suicide was the comments left where I usually watch my dramas. There were many people who thought that the transformation was abrupt and idealistic, and there were those who were very sympathetic towards her as well.

For me, I think that the writers did a good job in characterising Soo Ah. In fact, I always felt that she was remorseful for what she has done but she chooses to hide that remorse away and protects herself by being hurtful and arrogant. One of the key scenes that really highlight that point is when she was being a bitch to Dong Jae, who really saw through her and asked if she was apologising. I also appreciate how she has a particular soft spot for her friend who committed suicide. Those scenes, coupled with her little hideout (I love it everytime Dong Jae catches her in the act, so funny!), show that she’s really having a hard time.

On top of that, Kim Yeol is so smart and always sees through her evil deeds, and this made me rather ambivalent towards her as a villain. As a result, I’ve never disliked her and I’m rather amused at how most of her evil acts either propel the couple towards each other or end up in something good for everyone else but her. That being said, she’s obviously not my favourite character and I was taken aback by my own tears as she prepares for her suicide.

Her suicide – which brings me to this point. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t dislike the suicide; in fact I was so emotionally attached to it that I cried more than I expected to. But after the tears, I really started thinking how people would actually react in reality.  Instead of taking the blame upon each of themselves, it’s more likely that everyone is going to deny any responsibility for pushing somebody to a suicide. You may say verbally oh no, this is all my fault, but you don’t actually wish that it’s your fault. Everyone will probably hope secretly that someone else is really the trigger.

What I didn’t like was the fact that her suicide changed everything. Suddenly, everyone is her friend and standing up for her. Those who talked about her behind her back are hateful, but even the ones who stood up for her made me think – why haven’t you done that before? Nothing has changed except for her suicide, which really means that her suicide transforms you guys into friends and that shouldn’t be the point. It makes it seems like a suicide solves all problems and is the miracle pill to everything.

However, I do think that that isn’t the message the drama is bringing across. It could be a problem of execution or the fact that this is just 12 episodes and dedicating one entire episode to the suicide was enough. What I think really is the point of the suicide is to show how even that bitchy girl could be having a hard time. Does that make whatever she did right? Definitely not! But I guess it shows the power of friendship, love and just the simple act of giving a helping hand.

Ultimately, I think that I would have loved it more if the rest of the cheerleading club was more of her friends in the first place. They weren’t; there was barely any amiable interaction between them and the drama couldn’t have fit that in because Soo Ah was being mean from episode 1. Or you could just have a select group of them doing what they did post-suicide – Yeon Doo would have made a lot of sense because she was originally Soo Ah’s friend and she always cared for Soo Ah. If you have the entire cheerleading club do what they did in Episode 10, as just an idealistic drama, I’m touched by their efforts and love, but I can’t help thinking that if this was in reality, many of them could be doing that to assuage their guilt of having been a reason behind Soo Ah’s suicide.

Perhaps another point of the suicide was to show how our acts have unintended effects, but I don’t actually think Kim Yeol was being a jerk for threatening her with the video. He even gave her chances to confess! Am I just being mean?

Out of the entire episode, I think my favourite scene is when Soo Ah was with Dong Jae, experiencing all the fun and life as a 17 year old should. Everything else that happens after that is just food for thought. What do you guys think?

<3thoughtsramble